Great Quote By Obama

 "My friends, we live in the greatest  nation in the history of the world.
I hope you’ll join with me as we try to change it." (Barak Hussein Obama) 

The Personnel Manager said, ‘Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except one. Unless you pass it , you cannot qualify for this job.’

Mujibar said, ‘I am ready.’

The manager said, ‘Make a sentence using the words Yellow , Pink, and Green.’

Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, ‘Mister manager, I am ready’

The manager said, ‘Go ahead.’

Mujibar said, ‘The telephone goes Green, Green , and I Pink it up, and say, ‘ Yellow ‘, this is Mujibar.’

Mujibar now works at a call center.

No doubt you have spoken to him. I know I have.

MARIJUANA FILLED FIREWOOD

"Hello, is this the Sheriff’s Office?"

"Yes. What can I do for you?"

"I’m calling to report ’bout my neighbor Virgil Smith….He’s hidin’ marijuana inside his firewood! Don’t quite know how he gets it inside them logs, but he’s hidin’ it there."

"Thank you very much for the call, sir."

The next day, the Sheriff’s Deputies descend on Virgil’s house. They search the shed where the firewood is kept. Using axes, they bust open every piece of wood, but find no marijuana. They sneer at Virgil and leave.

Shortly, the phone rings at Virgil’s house.

"Hey, Virgil! This here’s Floyd… .Did the Sheriff come?"

"Yeah!"

"Did they chop your firewood?"

"Yep!"

"Happy Birthday, buddy!"

(more…)

You are driving in a car at a constant speed.  On your left side is a ‘drop off’ (The ground is 18-20 inches below the level you are traveling on), and on your right side is a fire engine traveling at the same speed as you. In front of you is a galloping horse which is the same size as your car and you cannot overtake it. Behind you is another galloping horse. Both horses are also traveling at the same speed as you . What must you do to safely get out of this highly dangerous situation?

For the answer click and drag your mouse from star on the left to the star on the right .

* Get your drunk ass off the merry-go-round. *

Hospital Window
A great note for all to read it will take just 37 seconds to read this and change your thinking

Two men, both seriously ill, occupied the same hospital room. One man was allowed to sit up in his bed for an hour each afternoon to help drain the fluid from his lungs. His bed was next to the room’s only window. The other man had to spend all his time flat on his back. The men talked for hours on end. They spoke of their wives and families, their homes, their jobs, their involvement in the military service, where they had been on vacation.

Every afternoon when the man in the bed by the window could sit up, he would pass the time by describing to his roommate all the things he could see outside the window.

The man in the other bed began to live for those one hour periods where his world would be broadened and enlivened by all the activity and color of the world outside.
(more…)

Yourself…

Your Lender…

Your Buyer…

Your Appraiser…

Your Tax Assessor…